Archive for category Memorial Tributes

Back Again
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Let me begin by saying, “I’m sorry.” Not just to those of you who are dedicated readers of this blog, but also to my friend and fellow writer on this site, Scott. He has bore the weight of solely maintaining Daddy Thoughts in my absence.

It was mid-September that my life was interrupted with unexpected changes. Late-September when my family went on a cruise for my Grandmother’s 80th birthday. She was left behind, hospitalized due to several severe blood clots in need of treatment. And now, late-October—the 26th to be exact—two weeks after she passed.

It has been six agonizing weeks filled with hope, caring, praying, triumphs, recoveries, relapses, and now loss. But amidst the surging and diminution of emotions, the increased tensions and then ebbing of enflamed nerves—one thing has managed to persevere: The love of my grandmother, Shirley Elizabeth Engilis.

It was her request that we all still go on the cruise to celebrate her life; Her request that we come together as a family, like years passed, spending the time with one another; And her request that we continue to come together and remember her love in the time that we spend with one another.

As loss does often wrought, I—as well as most of my family—have recently been forced to contemplate that which we all share in common: death. And although that is the single-most-finite thing that we all share, I do not believe it the end. Perhaps the end of a physical existence here on earth. But of one thing I am certain. I saw my grandmother on the day of her funeral.

Not the vessel which she occupied that now resides within her casket. I saw her in the six children that survived her. They stood together, arms around one another; Bodies pressed, interlocked as one. And in that moment, as they shared the grief—I saw them moved by her love.

As one is lost, one is gained….
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As one is lost, one is gained….

It’s funny to think about life… it’s so short! I am involved in this Daddy Thoughts blog site, with my dear friend John, which whom I have known since we were both in elementary school. That is a huge accomplishment, on both of our parts, to have known each other for so long, and that we have remained such great friends. I do not believe that he will mind me sharing this, as this has been a tough week for him, and rather a tough few weeks. My partner in crime on this website, John, lost someone very close to him this week. An immediate family member and close relative, who was able to live a long and joyous life, but with knowing this, it still does not mask the pain of her loss. She will be missed tremendously by him, and for me I just want to be there for him in whatever he needs. I knew her, met her several times, and knew of her through John, but my goal is to laugh and think of good times for him. But, with this loss, I can’t help but think of what I have gained just a few short weeks ago. I was able to bring a precious baby boy, while another was loosing their life. It is such a strange feeling, one that is hard to describe in words. As one is lost, one is gained…. One day Colby will have to feel the toughest loss of all, which is life, and I will have trouble explaining to him how to deal with it. I know that he will figure it out, as we all do, but it is one of those things that are extremely tough on me. I can not begin to feel what John is feeling this week, and my thoughts and prayers are with him and his family during this difficult time.

Remember, we love you John and always will, my friend!